Am I the source of every fcuking thing that happen?
Why does it always seem to be me. When things get better,I'm the one that cause it to be worst.
Project disagreement,met with us pissing off with each other and I walked out first. Sometimes,I wonder,if i didn walk out,would things be trashed out? (a different story,but I started it.)
I seriously hate it when I have high hope on a certain thing and then it comes crushing down like nobody's business.
The feeling sucks.
Yes,the convo ended up in a cold war.
Simply because,I have project datelines to meet and am unable to accompany you on sat cause I might head back to school.
You rebutted that you have exam on Monday.
You have exams and presentation to help you get your GP.
Mine's otherwise. Projects hold a whole lot of point and marks for my GP. Its like,project=exam. No books,no notes,just how you do your work and handing it up on time.
As much as I want to accompany you,making up for the loss time,I can't.
Everytime I say sorry,you won't want to listen anymore cause I've said too much of it.
And because of that,I begin to wonder the existence of 'sorry'.
Being a very cold person,having to have these kind of emotions going on,its tough.
Especially when work load increases. I can break down any moment. I just dont wish to think about any negative stuff. Ever since that quarrell,I've become very fragile and weak.
Having late nights,working the fcuking time off to get good grades isn't good. It hurts my body and thinking and even my sleep time.
I use to think that things between us will be different from the ones we both had. But somehow,it ended up in the wrong route.
My fault,my bad. I don't know how to solve or salvage this moment cause,I have no idea how to and when to.
I hate being on a emotional rollercoaster which I have been on for the past 1 week.
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I'm damn tired.
Kwan asked me a very stupid question on why am I still up and saying that no wonder I'm always sleeping in class.
I didn sleep in first lecture today. I only slept in second lecture cos it was boring and he's so funny with everything he did.haha.
Okay,I feel like cursing for the sleep loss.
Love,Mayguss.